California

California is beautiful and hot, but at least it is dry. Daniel has had fun riding Dan the horse and taking pictures of the rather brown landscape. There are black olive bushes and the old blooms of the Joshua trees. There wasn't enough rain to make anything bloom much at all this year. I got all my school stuff done and I am enjoying skipping the first couple of days of school because we won't be back until Sunday. I am also getting used to my new haircut, hopefully I can get it to what I want here really soon so I am not always frustrated by it. I am looking forward to the dinner out tonight, though I enjoy my mother-in-law's cooking very much.

Lost my Grandfather

Disappointment

Disappointment is a feeling that I am apparently going to be quite intimate with. I want to start a family more than anything else but it seems that my body hates me. I found out I was pregnant at 5 weeks and exactly a week later I lost it. I am also fairly sure I lost one in January also, but a bit sooner than this last one. I feel quite apathetic at this point about most everything and I just can't seem to get motivated. Maybe one day I will get something I want out of life besides more school and more disappointment.